They can also reside in the same house after a divorce is granted.
And now more than ever, this has become a more accepted, and sometimes a necessary method to secure the financial future of the family. It is not as common if there are no young children of the marriage, but simple logic dictates that it’s less expensive to run one house than two.
However, for those of you who are contemplating such a living arrangement, be very mindful that living under the same roof, (with or without children), requires a heightened sense of maturity, and respect for the other party. Because of the high cost of Suffolk County, it is quite common for couples who come to Mediation to co-reside in the same residence primarily for the benefit of their children. If a married couple with two children own a home and pay $2,500 a month for their mortgage and taxes, and they earn $150,000 a year, they can live a modest life in Suffolk County. They would have to be frugal, and would not have the trappings of the reason that they thought they were going to live in Suffolk County. It is simply unaffordable.
Once you separate husband and wife from the marital home with that income it becomes almost impossible to continue to reside in Suffolk County. If you do the math, $150,000 gross translates to at best $120,000 net, that is $10,000 a month if you divide it in half how could husband survive on $5,000 a month and if the wife has custody how could she survive on $5,000 a month? Because if that is the total income combined no matter how it is made up, that is all that there is to work with. It is $150,000 all in. Figuring that out in two separate households is a trick I never learned.
Yet couples with this level of combined income often figure out a way to manage to live separate and apart by cutting back on their respective expenses, or finding alternative income sources somewhere and they make it work.
Whether representing individual husbands or wives, or through the mediation process, I have meaningfully helped thousands of families in Suffolk County by guiding them through a very traumatic time in their lives. Together, these families will benefit from some sage advice and guidance, coupled with some very creative solutions that might not have been known or available to them without this guidance and advice.
Over the last 35 years, our office has successfully tried or settled thousands of divorces and legal separations for families living on Long Island, helping them find ways to raise their children without breaking their banks.